Sweaty Gaijin

During a formal Japanese business introduction it is important to be dressed in your finest business attire. A suit with a white shirt and black tie is ideal. Your clothes should be ironed and clean and not stray from the standard professional dress expected in Japan.

When entering a building where it is required to take off your shoes, step out of your shoes into the guest slippers placed at the foyer. Keep your outdoor shoes in a pair and place them with the other outdoor shoes, toes facing toward the exit of the building. In some cases, you can take your slippers from a locker and put your outdoor shoes in their place.

When meeting new people during these formal introductions, bow properly, with your hands to your side, keeping your back rigid and bending at your hips. Say, “Hajimemashitte” (Nice to meet you) and then introduce yourself with, “Watashi wa ___________ desu” (I am ___________). Conclude by saying Yoroshiku onegai shimas (another way of saying nice to meet you) and bow again.

It is important to receive a business card with both hands, admiring the card for some interesting detail, and then of course, bowing upon receipt of the card. Never put the business card into your pocket, nor bend, dog-ear or otherwise mar the card. When receiving multiple cards, place the cards on the table in front of you, face up, and order them from left to right according to importance.

At the introduction you will be asked to sit. Do not sit. You will be asked multiple times, but refrain from sitting until the most important person sits first. You will also be offered tea or coffee by the head of the meeting. Do not drink the tea or coffee. Wait until the most important person has taken a drink first. Make light talk about your plans. If you are a new gaijin English teacher in the area, light talk means discussing how excited you are to be working in Japan, asking about the students, and going over your tentative schedule. Do not talk about how successful you will be teaching the students English, nor about your past accomplishments. Be humble. Be quiet. Let the heads of the meeting guide the conversation.

When the introduction is over, you will be asked to stand. That’s right, don’t stand. Until? Now you’re catching on. Once the head of the meeting stands, you may do the same. Again, bow and say Yoroshiku onegai shimas. Gather the business cards given to you, stacking them from top to bottom in order of importance, and keep them in your hand. Bow multiple times upon leaving to show how thankful you are.

If you can follow these simple rules to a formal Japanese introduction, you will surely be successful.

* * *

I couldn’t stop sweating. There are few things more uncomfortable than a sweat soaked, starched, Target brand collared shirt with a tie cinching it down against your neck. I wasn’t nervous though. Despite all that I had been told to do at my introduction to the Board of Education, or BOE as they call it, I wasn’t nervous.

A heat wave had been breaking record highs in Japan for the first week of my arrival. While I sat in the BOE office, in full business attire, my face showed clear signs that I couldn’t handle the heat. Luckily, in Japan the custom is to have a handkerchief with you in order to wipe the sweat from your brow. I had brought mine, but a handkerchief only does so much when it has already soaked through. I also chose to use the handkerchief sparingly because I had had it since I was five years old and I was not sure if the tattered ends and holes in it would appear as the most hygienic of sweat wiping devices to the Japanese. I also doubted that the snarling tiger image on it would convince them of my professionalism. My only other option against constantly wiping the sweat from my face with a 22 year old handkerchief was to let the sweat pour and then act like I had no problem with it. Maybe the Japanese would think that in my country extreme perspiration is a normal thing.

But again, I wasn’t nervous. I felt like I knew what I was supposed to do. I had practiced the bowing, the business card holding and admiring, and the introductions in Japanese. I even made a point to take my shoes off every time I entered my own apartment, in order to start forming the habit. Mayumi, my translator and cultural liaison, before entering the office, had asked me if I was nervous. With a smile I said, “Of course not. I’m excited!” Now, with rivulets flowing down my face while talking with the head of the BOE, she must have thought that I had been lying through my teeth.

If my sweating was offensive, the others didn’t let on. They maintained a very amiable yet professional demeanor. I did my best to do the same. I collected business cards and laid them on the table accordingly. I talked about being happy to be teaching in Japan, and Mayumi translated for me. Meanwhile sweat came down in streams. It was just too hot. It was 90, with humidity at 80 percent. The fact that the others weren’t in my same condition shocked me. There was no way that anyone could adapt to such heat.

Okay, maybe the sweat came because I was a little nervous. As I recall, there was one point during my time at the BOE where my nerves may have initiated the deluge. Again, I had rehearsed the greetings for days before the meeting. One statement, Yoroshiku onegai shimas (Nice to meet you), I made sure was well etched into my head, as it was the most complicated. Having practiced, when I arrived at the BOE office, I was confident that I could execute the phrase with perfection. As I entered, the whole office stood up, I was introduced, and everyone, in unison, said to me, “Yoroshiku onegai shimas.”

I recognized the phrase instantly and I knew that my job was to repeat, bow and then sit back and feel good about properly introducing myself. With the best pronunciation I could muster I did just that.

“Yoroshiku onegai shimas” I said, with what I believed was excellent pronunciation.

I bowed, and right as I was going to settle into the feeling good about myself part, I realized that they were doing it again. They were bowing a second time and saying Yoroshiku onegai shimas. I wasn’t prepared for a second time, and I didn’t know the proper response. Nothing at orientation covered a second Yoroshiku onegai shimas, nor did any of the pre-departure readings that they gave me in tomes. Perplexed at the situation, I thought it best to follow their lead. For a second time I bowed and said Yoroshiku onegai shimas, except this time with a questioning inflection at the end. When I stopped, I saw that they were going down for a third bow, with a third Yoroshiku onegai shimas! We were like pinball machine paddles going back and forth at each other, but instead of hearing the bells and whistles of the pinball machine, what filled the room was a perpetual echo of Yoroshiku onegai shimas. No one gave any sign that this was unusual so I repeated my bow and said Yoroshiku onegai shimas for a third time.

Somehow, eventually, I was ushered to a meeting table and I wasn’t sure if I had totally messed up, or if that was exactly how it was supposed to go. That is when I noticed the sweat begin. That’s also when I noticed how uncomfortable my clothes were.

I made it through however, and performed all the ceremonial traditions as well as any new gaijin to Japan can. When the meeting at the BOE was ending, I remember thinking, “Thank God that these introductions only have to happen once.” Mayumi and I left the office, bowing and saying Yoroshiku onegai shimas even more, and then we made way into the hall. I started to walk down the corridor, but Mayumi hesitated.

“You’re not coming?” I asked.

“Uh, yes” she responded. “But we have to wait for Suzuki-san.”

“He’s going back home with us?” I joked.

“Uh, no. He is going to introduce us to the three other schools you will be working at. We have three more introduction meetings today.”

She saw that I was surprised and asked, “Are you nervous?”